Yet a thank you doesn’t really do justice to how much I really appreciate the wonderful gift you’ve given me.
I got right into your book and then decided to wait till I finish it before I connect with you. So that I can really talk to you about it … but now I have so much to say that even this messages doesn’t really do what and how I want to describe the journey this book took me on.
With your permission I would love to share my experience with the people in my life. (Those who will actually understand).
It was as if I am sitting right in front of you while listening to each chapter, and yet it was as if I saw myself telling the story.
It was as if my Soul so often responded with goosebumps of the resonance. And sometimes it felt like it was me that held the pen.
As if this was what my Soul has been trying to say to me all along; I just couldn’t hear it… I had to read it.
What means most to me is that I could do it through wonderful journey with you in reading this masterpiece the world may call a book … I have so much love and appreciation for you.
As soon as one thought is gone, another takes its place. As soon as a beggar leaves his corner, another one replaces him. As soon as one habit goes, another takes its place.
So, in essence, wherever there’s a hole, nature will try and fill it.
I found myself whining the other day.
If only “I had more time I’d write more.”
Guess what?
Over the last month or so, I’ve had oodles of time on my hands.
Did I write more?
No.
Here’s what I did.
I watched the entire 1st series of Homeland over the weekend.
My justification … “Well, it’s the weekend and I need a break.”
A break from what?
Taking more naps?
Watching more TV?
Having coffee and lunch with friends?
Dithering around doing this and that?
Nature sure does hate a vacuum and will fill it.
The problem is that nature doesn’t care what it fills the vacuum with.
And, it appears that in my case, at least, human nature doesn’t care either.
Human nature when not directed by the human will, will choose the path of least resistance towards pleasure and excitement.
It’ll seek instant gratification to soothe its hedonistic nature. It looks at the short game and loses sight of the long game.
It doesn’t want to do the hard yards upfront and delay gratification.
As the late Freddy Mercury sang, “I want it all, I want it all, I want it all, and I want it now.”
I know that if I want to write more books, I can’t have it all right now.
I need to put in the time.
When it comes to “Jacques, the writer”, putting pen to paper should be the only thing that occupies my time.
Hitting the keystrokes in the moment should be enough.
It should absorb me and give me pleasure beyond measure because I’m doing something worthwhile.
I’m writing my own story and fulfilling my destiny.
My wish is that I’ll have left those that have come into contact with me better off for having met me.
One of the ways I can make a small dent in this universe is to use the smidgen of talent I have.
That’s to write.
I’m the pen of someone that’s infinite.
Someone that’s older, wiser and purer than me and has had it figured out for 4-billion+ years.
Someone that already knows what my destiny is.
So, from today onwards I’m need to understand that I’m a creature of habit.
So, I may as well get good habits … like, writing, meditating, journaling and praying.
I need to stop playing small and letting nature fill the vacuums in my life and dictating it.
I need to tap into my human nature and fill the vacuums in my life with worthwhile pursuits.
That is, if I want to play big and reach the finish line with grace.
I want my final thought to be, “Well, played, Jacques. Well played.”
I’m too embarrassed to think how much time I’ve wasted railing against the world, something, someone or some situation.
I get angry and shake my fists at the heaven more often than I should (which should be never).
I’m embarrassed because I thought that the mental and spiritual work I’ve done on myself over the years would have set me up nicely to be above anger and judgement.
I thought I was beyond pettiness, anger and displeasure until I looked at some of my posts on Facebook.
Hell’s bells, it appears that I’m offended by lots of things, including:
Zuma
Ace
Screw me, I’m offended by the ANC in its entirety
Helen Zille
Elon Musk (Why is everyone in love with him … am I missing something?)
Steve Jobs
Mediocrity
Myself
Littering
And, Facebook itself
Carlos Castaneda gave me a moment to pause as he often does: “Think about it: what weakens us is feeling offended by the deeds and misdeeds of our fellow men. Our self-importance requires that we spend most of our lives offended by someone.”
He’s right, you know.
Feeling offended and self-righteous is a vanity I can ill-afford. Whilst the deeds or misdeeds of others distract me I’m missing out on an opportunity to do the most important work … working on myself.
It should be as simple as minding my own business and getting on with my real job which is preparing for the ultimate cataclysmic event in my life; my death.
But of course, minding my own business isn’t that simple, is it? I have to live in the world and I’m affected by what others do.
And, in this world sometimes things have to be put right.
When I believe something should be put right I ask myself whether I can or cannot do something meaningful about it.
Sometimes I just believe what Etsko Schuitema says: We are not here to fix things. We are here to witness how they work.
I’ve come to the conclusion that most places where I stick my nose in I really can’t make an iota of a difference.
I’m beyond arrogant if I think that my utterances will move the dial one iota.
So, why do I still persist on sticking my nose in where it shouldn’t be? Why do I persist in feeling offended?
Why do I persist with this self-importance?
I’ve come to the conclusion that it is easier to stick my nose in other peoples’ affairs than mind my own business.
Because minding my own business and working on myself is hard. It’s easy for Socrates to sprout forth, “The unexamined life is not worth living.”
Maybe I’m from the “ignorance is bliss” school, but I don’t always feel inclined to examine my life lest I bring up the dragons and demons that are simmering just below the surface.
I’ve slewed a lot of them.
But the deeper I go into myself, the more dragons and demons I find.
In the final analysis, I’m going to have to be courageous and start examining my life properly (damn you, Socrates) so that I can slay the dragons and demons and bring out the extraordinary miracle that’s me.
I should also be pragmatic and realise that there’ll always be one or two dragons and demons lurking around.
They’re just there to keep me on my toes and keep me real.
Examining my life is one way that I can honour my creator for gracing me with the opportunity to play on this planet for a little while longer.
When you’re with anyone … a partner, a client or a friend … be interested and not interesting.
When you’re the most interesting (and smartest) person in the room, go find another room.
And, when you’re in that room, go and find the most talented person and stand next to her. Be interested. You might learn something.
Don’t get me wrong, its feels good to be the most interesting and smartest person in the room (never happened to me yet). Therein lies the danger.
There’s the danger of our ego getting out of hand. We start craving the recognition more and more.
There’s the danger of keeping the status quo when we think we know it all. This is treacherous ground. This you normally find in the narcissist at worst, and someone who believes his own public relations, at best.
There’s the danger of others giving you too much control over their lives. It’s dangerous for them because they never get empowered. And it’s dangerous for you because the more control you have, the more temptation you have to abuse it.
“Power tends to corrupt, absolute power corrupts absolutely.”
Lord Acton
Finding another room with people way smarter and more interesting than you is a big fat adventure. You expose yourself to more. You learn more. You realise that there is more than one viewpoint. You evolve and grow.
Here’s the thing, though. All of us are the most interesting and smartest person in the room. It all depends on which room we’re in. We’ve been conditioned to think that those that get good marks at school are clever and those that don’t (let me not sugar coat it) are stupid.
This thinking is flawed. Some top students are wonderful at memorising large tracts of information over the short-term. Just long enough to get it out onto an exam paper. But, have they really internalised the knowledge so that it can be useful in the future? Or have they parroted it?
We know that there are different kinds of smart. Would you call Pablo Picasso, who has gifted the world with some of the most compelling art, stupid because he couldn’t figure out 176 x 14? Go on, give it a bash without a calculator … what’s 176 x 14?
I know that when I get a plumber in to fix something in my house, right then I’m certainly not the smartest person in the room.
We’re all onteresting and smart in our own way. But the really smart folk know that they hardly know anything, and they are able to humble themselves enough to learn from others. They’re infinitely curious. They’re interested.
So, go and find yourself another room and become more interested than interesting because adventure and growth awaits you.
I know E.B. White as the co-author of my grammar bible, The Elements of Style. What I did not know was that he was a prolific essayist and author of the children’s books, Stuart Little and Charlotte’s Web.
In March 1973, a Mr Nadeau asked White’s opinion on what he thought as a bleak future for the human race.
I think this letter is as apt now as it was for all of us who are trying to navigate the volatile and uncertain times we’re living in now.
North Brooklyn, Maine
30 March 1973
Dear Mr. Nadeau:
As long as there is one upright man, as long as there is one compassionate woman, the contagion may spread and the scene is not desolate. Hope is the thing that is left to us, in a bad time. I shall get up Sunday morning and wind the clock, as a contribution to order and steadfastness.
Sailors have an expression about the weather: they say, the weather is a great bluffer. I guess the same is true of our human society—things can look dark, then a break shows in the clouds, and all is changed, sometimes rather suddenly. It is quite obvious that the human race has made a queer mess of life on this planet.
But as a people we probably harbour seeds of goodness that have lain for a long time waiting to sprout when the conditions are right. Man’s curiosity, his relentlessness, his inventiveness, his ingenuity have led him into deep trouble. We can only hope that these same traits will enable him to claw his way out.
Like W. Edwards Deming, they get that, “change is not mandatory; neither is survival”.
They pull the rest of us out of the quagmire of ignorance so that we do have a chance to survive.
And, some of us will be lucky enough to thrive because of them.
I’m privileged to have these people as my friends.
They’re writers, professional speakers, entrepreneurs, intellectuals, philosophers and men and women of the spirit (and, of spirit). They’re you.
None of them are what you’d call, “normal”
Their very abnormality makes them giants. I get to see further because I stand on their shoulders. This quote stolen and mangled by me from the famous heretic, Isaac Newton.
These heretics hold me to a higher standard and make sure that I smarten up.
Their work keeps me on track.
They ensure that I never cheapen my art by asking for less effort, and demanding less work of myself.
They know that mediocrity is a gravitational force whose Siren’s song is strong.
I’m pulled by it … every waking minute.
If I don’t stand sentinel to my weaker spirit, I too will find myself shipwrecked on the rocks of Anthemoessa.
And, that’s a place I’ll never come back from.
Go and find your own heretic
Find a Newton, Galileo, Musk, Socrates, Foucault, Tesla, Chomsky, Godin, Da Vinci, Honda, Peterson, Smuts, Krog, Suzman, First, Curie, Einstein, Mandela, Feynman and Fuller.
They’re sitting in your churches, mosques and synagogues. They’re in your family. They’re at your work.
They’re easy to spot, but hard to emulate.
They’re scary because they have a truth about them that can be intimidating.
They’re single-minded. They hold themselves to a higher standard.
They look out of place in a world of sameness, mediocrity and dumbness.
They’re also dangerous.
They’re dangerous to your status quo.
If you want to stay the same, avoid them.
If you want disturbance, struggle, adventure and to live; go to them.
One of my companions on this journey, Cobus Visser, the Superman of Africa ᕙ(o‸o)ᕗ (he really is if you take into consideration what afflicts him every day) posted this meme: “It’s not about perfect, it’s about effort” on LinkedIn the other day.
He gave his opinion on it: “If you put in 100% of your effort, eventually perfection will follow. Do every task with passion and intention!”
I agree with his second line. His first line not so much ¯_( ツ )_/¯.
Although, Cobus is hugely successful, so he might put up a fight about my response.
ᕦ༼ ˵ ◯ ਊ ◯ ˵ ༽ᕤ
Here’s how I responded
“Cobus, it does not follow that if you put 100% effort in that perfection will eventually follow. How many times have you put in 100% and never achieved the result you wanted? I can count 100s, probably 1000s of times in my case.
It’s more helpful to focus on the process/effort to develop one as a human being. Perfection in the world of work and life is a myth. We’re just iterating all the time and incrementally making things better.”
Process eats results for breakfast.
A life coach responded to my comment with: “Agreed. I would say success will follow, rather than perfection.”
I think that she fell into the same trap as Cobus. Here’s my response: If you interchange success with perfection, the same applies. Success is never guaranteed as a consequence of hard work. Success is often a roll of the dice. If you’ve read anything by Lebanese Economist, Nassim Taleb, you’ll get an idea of how it works.
The skinny
He says that there are millions of entrepreneurs in the graveyard of failure who are smarter, and have more opportunity than people like Bill Gates, Steve Jobs and Richard Branson.
He contends that a lot of ‘success’ (if we talk business and financial) is as a consequence of one word: Randomness.
You need a bit of luck, or as I like to think, ‘divine intervention’ to become ‘successful’.
Build deep and wide networks
You and I have little say in the affair. Think on it, you had no control over which parents were chosen for you. That was already the start of your journey. If you had been born to different parents and different circumstances, there’s no doubt that your life would be different, wouldn’t it?
For me the trick is to build wide and deep networks. You never know when you’re sitting next to an angel.
This will give you a better chance of being ‘successful’, but even that isn’t a guarantee.
Be the best version of yourself, work on your business, become a master crafts person and show up excellent in the world. That’s all you can do, the rest isn’t up to you and me.
————————————————————————————————————————————
Neither Cobus, nor the lifecoach were harmed in the writing of this article.
I see that Cobus’s affliction is not mentioned on his website. Send him a note and say, “Jacques said I must ask what your affliction is). I’m sure he will tell you because he does so on stage.
This Harvard story is an apocryphal one. However, my own research over the last 20 years (leading 10 sales teams and training more than 10 000 selling professionals and being invited as a motivational speaker to local and international sales conference) points in the direction that validates the story in terms of its underlying concept.
➥ A Harvard graduating class was asked how many of them would choose sales as a career. The answer came to around 4% of the class. How many of them do you think actually went into a sales career? An astounding 67%. ☚
This means that engineers, accountants, lawyers and whatnot are not in careers of their choosing. They’re not working in their passion, they don’t want to really be selling, and the fit is not right.
Is it any wonder that the Chally came up with this figure: 80% of the sales team is only hitting 42% of target. Chally has interviewed more than 21000 sales teams
I suspect that those who aren’t cutting it didn’t want to be in career involving selling in the first place. Once again, it’s a wrong fit.
Circumstances being what they are, I’m assuming that they couldn’t get a job in their own field. Many selling positions have a low barrier to entry and to get a graduate in must be a feather in the sales managers cap. It is sometimes just the wrong fit.
How does one overcome this disconnect with sales professionals not being passionate about their field? Any suggestions?
The will to victory may be demonstrated in places other than actual battle.
A Roman general was leading his legions towards the enemy in a swampy country.
He knew that the next day’s battle would be fought on a certain plain because it was the only dry, flat place for miles.
He pushed his army all night, marching them through a frightening and formidable swamp, so that they reached the battle site before the foe and could claim the high ground.
In the aftermath of victory, the general called his troops together and asked them, “Brothers, when did we win the battle?”
One captain replied, “Sir, when the infantry attacked.”
Another said, “Sir, we won when the cavalry broke through.”
“No, said the general.
“We won the battle the night before – when our men marched through that swamp and took the high ground.”
Abstract: Gratitude is the fuel that could guide excellence. “Did you become excellent with the many gifts that were given you?”, will be one of the questions we’ll need to account for at the end of this game.
Many of us baulk at the culture of mediocracy that has misshapen our world today. It has become the most prevalent disease of our age and has malformed us as a species.
It has turned us from craftsmen into caricatures of carelessness and from excellent to errant.
Excellence has become a Grail quest for many leaders, consultants and authors. There’s a befuddling amount of advice on how to strive for excellence. I’ve decided to pick a lane and run my idea of excellence through the filter that I’m going to argue for now.
In this piece of text I’m going to argue for one overarching reason to strive for excellence as a human being. The fuel that propels this premise is a concept called gratitude.
There are many reasons to strive for excellence. The usual suspects include becoming a better boss, a better employee, a better father/mother/son/daughter.
We are told that being excellent is about how we show up in the world. The better we tackle the work before us, the more useful we are. The more useful we are the more our agenda for security, power, fulfilment and harmony is met. Most texts about excellence are concerned with the issue of people, production and profits
I argue that when it comes to excellence there’s a bigger concern than people, production and profits. That concern is gratitude to something infinitely wiser than we are!
Gratitude should be superordinate to everything. And, excellence is the currency of gratitude which is due to our Creator who allows us to play here for a little while.
This story that we’re enjoying now was written solely to enchant us and to give us an opportunity to express the divine in us.
In my opinion, the real question is how are we going to recompense our creator for allowing us to experience the awesomeness that is our lives?
There are only two possible ways we can present ourselves to our creator one day:
F$*k You
Thank You.
If it’s a f$*k you it’ll mean that we treated this life as an arbitrary, throwaway thing that has no meaning. At best, this attitude justifies us embracing the mediocrity that is the dominant Zeitgeist in today’s world. At worst, it turns us into selfish predators concerned only with the issues of survival.
If it’s a thank-you, then it means that we treated this life as something wonderful, adventurous and treasured. It means that we strove to break the shackles of mediocrity, ingratitude and self-interest to become the most excellent version of ourselves.
There’ll come a day when you and I will be ferried by Charon over the River Styx to meet our creator.
What will our coin be? How will we show our gratitude for this brief interlude that is our life before our continuation date? Will our best work be a dung heap of mediocrity, misery and malice? Or will we present as a piece of excellence, a work of art and the greatest version of ourselves?
