Tag: spirituality

  • Why Life Is Like WhatsApp

    Why Life Is Like WhatsApp

    Article 21/365 of Jacques’s writing quest.

    I don’t know about you, but I belong to a bunch of WhatsApp groups. Most of them have a specific goal and in my experience, most of them lose their shape. People share irrelevant messages in groups, causing us to forget the original purpose of the group.

    Is life not similar?

    Like me, you probably had a vision for how your life would pan out and cobbled a plan together to get there. How’s that working out for you? 

    My plan to become a philosophy professor at Stellenbosch University died decades ago. My life didn’t shape out at all how I imagined it. 

    As the poet, Robert Burns, famously said, “The best laid plans of mice and men oft go awry.” 

    I’ve realised three things. 

    1. My journey may not follow the exact path I imagined, but it is the correct path for me to express my divine self. Whilst it is at first not apparent, I am a philosopher, albeit not at Stellenbosch University. For the past 22 years, I have shared my philosophy of “finding a path with heart” in numerous articles and on over 2000 stages and classrooms worldwide.
    2. If you’re not on a path that fills your heart with joy, you can get off it any time you want to. There’s no affront to you or anyone else to do so. Like a WhatsApp group, you can leave it at any time. Do it now if your heart cries out for more.
    3. My life has turned out just as it should as dictated by my soul contract in its quest to reach its highest potential. My life is way richer and more fulfilling than anything I could have imagined for myself. That’s not by my own doing but by an ingenuity far greater than anything I can imagine. I surrender to that ingenuity to use me as it sees fit.

    Whatever path you’re on is the one that you’re supposed to be on right now based on how far you’ve evolved in your journey to express your true being. The more conscious you become of your divine right to play here at this time and of the purpose you have been brought to earth to carry out, the more fulfilled you will be.

    Photo Credit: Writesonic AI. “Discover a path adorned with a heart, reminiscent of the surrealistic style of Salvador Dali. Vibrant colors, dream-like atmosphere, melting and distorted elements, symbolic imagery, imaginative composition, oil on canvas, 20th-century art movement, highly detailed, thought-provoking, 4K resolution.”

  • The Healing Power Of Silence

    The Healing Power Of Silence

    Article 16/365 of Jacques’s writing quest.

    I have found true silence once in my life and since then I’ve been on a Grail quest to find it again.

    I don’t know about you, but I find that there’s too much noise around. If it’s not in my environment, it’s in my head. 

    And, having tinnitus buzzing in my ears, doesn’t help my Grail quest.

    I was taking a run at the Pinnacle Point Golf Course in Mosselbay when I came across a small valley. As I ran through it, all the noise ceased. I stopped, puzzled. I spoke just to make sure that I hadn’t finally gone stone deaf. 

    I sat down and absorbed the sound of silence. It enveloped me like a loving cocoon and soothed me. I became no thing, no one, and no place. For a brief moment of time (turned out that it was 10 minutes) I really felt as if I was connected to the great soup of consciousness.

    I felt like I was home with the great mother that I’d disconnected from lifetimes ago. For the first time in a long time (ever), I felt real peace.

    I’ve seen the healing power of silence, and it is something to behold. I went to the Bateleur Nature Reserve in Waterberg for a team building activity with around 15 corporate executives who were hardened, cynical, and jaded. 

    Our facilitators took us to a dry river bed one evening. They asked us to lie on our backs and look at the magnificent cosmos. We were then asked to close our eyes and let the majesty of it all take us. 

    It couldn’t have been more than five minutes when we heard the first sob. Then came the next one, and then the one after that. Before long, all of us were howling. 

    For me, it felt like every sin I was carrying disappeared. For the first time in my life I felt connected to all that is. It was a seminal moment in my life. The catharsis of crying is amazing. 

    I want to find that peace and connection again.

    Please, let the noise stop.

  • There’s Energy To The Familiar

    There’s Energy To The Familiar

    Article 13/365 of Jacques’s Writing Quest

    There’s energy to the familiar. Place has memory and time has memory.

    I’ll never forget when I used to sleep in the mosque (مَسْجِد) at the spiritual retreat in Walker Fruit Farms. I had a profound and tranquil sleep every time. Countless prostration and prayers echoed off the walls and rose up from the Persian carpets. It was like a homecoming to the source. Comforting like a mother to a child. 

    I’ve always loved hanging out in holy spaces. They carry the essence of the divine and the magnitude of everything that is. I’ve spent a lot of time in cathedrals in France and Italy, prayed in Dutch Reformed churches, given thanks at shamanic Despachos, meditated to music at kirtan, and remembered my Rab at Dhikr.

    I’ve created a small space for myself at my home where I undertake my spiritual practice; prayer and meditation. The more I practice in this space, the more I feel its energy growing. Sometimes I just step into the space, and immediately feel a profundity of being. 

    I’ve discovered that doing my spiritual practice at the same time every day, in the special space I’ve created, has a much bigger impact.

    I would imagine that the place and time has become what the NLP practitioners call a trigger. I grooved a habit. 

    I’ve managed to do the same for my writing. I write at the same place every day and have set up quirky rituals that help me get into the groove. I’m assuming that speaking to Hemingway is quirky and not on the road to full-blown madness. I always give thanks to the muse, Calliope who helps me become eloquent and heroic in my writing.

    The more I practice (spirituality and writing), the more the two intertwine and blur into a consciousness stream. I can’t tell the difference between them any more. I cannot separate them from me and me from them. We are no thing and one thing. The more I practice these things, the more I see a sliver of the divine. Let’s hope I don’t run out of road before I turn that sliver into a crack so that I can get a peek at enlightenment. How wonderful would that be?

  • Impeccability

    Impeccability

    Article 2/365 of Jacques’s Writing Quest

    I read Don Miguel Ruiz’s, The Four Agreements. A Practical Guide For Personal Freedom a while ago.

    The book explores the four agreements: “Be impeccable with your word”, “Do not take anything personally”, “Do not make assumptions”, and “Always do your best”.

    I want to explore, “Be impeccable with your word.”

    According to the latest research in a Joe Dispenza interview, 50% of what we talk about regarding our past isn’t even true. And, that’s a discussion for another day.

    I don’t know about you, but I have been known to stretch the truth and sometimes downright lie. As a writer, I often need to add fiction to make the story more exciting. But that’s just a way of justifying things to make me feel better. Maybe I’m not just a writer but a bad human. 

    The fact is that we all lie to ourselves every day. Just think about some of the stories you believe, even now, that aren’t true. Stories that your parents, teachers and friends sold you. “You’ll never amount to much.” “Children must be seen and not heard.” “You’re going to hell if you don’t believe.”

    These stories are patently untrue because you are a masterpiece created to craft a master-work. Thus, you cannot be diminished. Unless you believe you can be. 

    For me there are three strong reasons for being impeccable with your word.

    1. We diminish ourselves

    By not being impeccable with our word, we diminish our worth. Not keeping commitments, even small ones like washing the dishes after we promised to do them, reduces our self-worth and erodes our standing in the consciousness of ourselves and others. I know that when I break a commitment, tell a ‘white lie’ or worse, a whopper, I loathe myself. By the way, just by having read the word ‘loathe’ you have been diminished ever so slightly. This is the power of words, use them carefully.

    2. Words create our reality

    Our words shape our reality. Words have real power. So, every time we use a negative word, we sabotage ourselves. The other day it occurred to me that if I spoke to my friends like I speak to myself, I’d have no friends. We’re extremely hard on ourselves. We have to change that and become gentle on ourselves. It is difficult not to be negative, especially in the dark times we live in. But, if we want to realise our potential, we need to start couching our words in the positive. The more we do that, the easier things become.

    3. We are bullshit detectors

    Our connection to all living beings allows us to easily sense when something feels off. When we lie to someone we know it, and they know it. The other person may not say it out loud or may choose to believe a false statement, but deep down, at a subconscious level, they know the truth.

    And, because we are all connected, when we hurt the other, we also hurt ourselves. 

    Practice speaking carefully to improve ourselves, create the reality we desire, and connect genuinely with others, including those we influence worldwide. 

  • What’s the big deal about non-attachment?

    What’s the big deal about non-attachment?

    Article 1/365 of Jacques’s Writing Quest

    I never considered non-attachment until someone I loved left me to start a new life overseas.

    I’d heard that attachment leads to pain and suffering. And, in my case, and in this instance, it was spot on. I was devastated. It must have taken me a year for me to recover from the ‘loss’ of this soul mate. 

    I was in a happy place with her and my desire to stay in this place of happiness caused me to attach. I wanted this happiness to stay forever.

    Time has moved on, and I’ve healed. I’ve also had time to explore the concept of non-attachment. I’ve realised that everything is ephemeral. You may argue that a 40-year relationship or a 90-year-old life is a long time, but in the grand scheme of the universe it is but a blink of an eye. 

    We are all going to lose something or someone on the way to navigating our way to our final loss; our own demise.

    Two tricks I’ve been practising which have served me in good stead recently are to not get attached to an outcome, and that I possess nothing.

    Detach from Outcomes

    Fortunately, I learned not to get attached to an outcome a long time ago. It has served me well. I’ve tried and failed so many times that if I had to take my failures personally, I don’t think I’d be able to function. I’ve asked countless women out, and perhaps a handful have said yes. And, that was good enough for me. I’ve made thousands of sales calls in my lifetime, and a small percentage of those bought what I had to sell. That’s good enough for me. I’ve played thousands of games of chess, and lost most of them. That’s good enough for me. I’ve been lucky because I see life like a game. And, for me, it’s about the joy of the game. I just want to play the game well, win or lose. 

    I Possess Nothing

    This is a more difficult concept and another story altogether. I’m so used to saying ‘my’ and ‘mine’ that it is coded into my DNA. That’s a harder habit to kick. It occurred to me that I possess nothing. Yet, I think I do. 

    That’s ‘my phone’. ‘My house’. ‘My car’. ‘My cat’. ‘My employee’. ‘My wife’. ‘My child’. It’s a better idea to look at ‘my car’ as a car. ‘My phone’ as a phone. Of course, it’s harder to say a girlfriend than my girlfriend. She probably won’t take kindly to me introducing her as a girlfriend, and I’ll be banished to my couch. It’s harder to say a child than my child. 

    Since when has any soul in my orbit become a possession of mine? At best, I’m a custodian of a soul for a brief time. Just because I’m practising non-attachment to another human being, it doesn’t mean that I’m uncaring or disassociated. On the contrary, I’m privileged to have custody of this soul’s well-being for a short time. This is a great responsibility, and one that I tackle with love, kindness and compassion. 

    I Was Given An Opportunity To Practise Non-Attachment

    This practice of non-attachment came in handy recently after ‘my’ a car that I’m driving at the moment, was trashed by hail outside a restaurant I was visiting. The damage was devastating. Typically, after such an incident, I would have felt regret, remorse and recrimination. “Why did I go out tonight?” “Why can’t I have one night without something going wrong?” “Can’t I catch a break?” “Why does this always happen to me?” This, of course, would lead me down the path of where I think something is being done to me, which is a hop, skip and a jump away from victimhood. 

    I have to be honest, when I saw the car, I did have a moment of angst. But because I’ve practised not being attached to ‘my’ a car, I recovered quickly. Also, I was distracted by a car guard who was soaking wet and looked really sorry that he couldn’t protect the car. This beautiful human was way more valuable than my a car. It was more appropriate to give him attention and not the car. I thanked him for looking out for the car and gave him a generous tip.

    This was a small victory, but I’m convinced the more I practise non-attachment, the more I’ll keep my equanimity in any situation where I perceive a ‘loss’. 

    Thinking of possession as custodianship and accepting that everything and everyone eventually comes to an end, including myself, brings me peace and comfort. That can’t be a bad thing, can it? It’s getting late, and I need to shut down ‘my’ computer and go to ‘my’ bed. Night, night.

  • Writing is not for sissies

    Writing is not for sissies

    I write one masterpiece to ninety-one pages of shit. I try to put the shit into the wastebasket. Ernest Hemingway

    If I was going all spiritual on your ass, I’d say that Hemingway had it pegged when it came to calling it. Put the shit in the wastebasket and move on with your life. We know he didn’t have life pegged because he sucked on a shotgun in the end (be it by his own hand, the mafia or the CIA, we’ll never know).

    Today I want to explore book writing.

    If you want to write a book, don’t. Unless you’re ready to face every demon, weakness and mental frailty you have. Because they will all be tested. I promise you.

    My friend Alison Weihe just finished her book (I had a small hand in birthing it as an editor).You can get it here.

    image

    It’s a great book. It has been sent to Mindvalley … don’t be surprised if you see her as a main stage speaker in Estonia this year.

    This is what I said about Alison in May 2021on LinkedIn and it is unfolding just as I predicted. She got a standing ovation at a peer conference on Sunday. You’ll soon see her everywhere.

    I’ve only known Alison for the shortest time (three years). First when she was an emerging speaker at the Professional Speakers Association of Southern Africa, then as a friend and finally as a client.

    She has metamorphosed into a beautiful butterfly when it comes to the craft of storytelling. I’ve been privileged to watch her grow.

    I’m a big fan of the Mindvalley programmes, as is Alison – it has the most enlightened, engaging and brilliant teachers on the planet who are raising human consciousness.

    I have no doubt that Alison will one day be standing on a Mindvalley stage in Estonia sharing her wisdom and mesmerising the audience with her skill, storytelling and wisdom.

    If I were you, I’d book Alison now to speak at your next conference to inspire your employees … she’s still affordable. When she hits superstar status (as I’m sure she will) and gets on the world stage, she might just be out of your and my price range.

    Go to her now, it’ll be one of the best decisions you’ve made for your staff in a long time.

    The Truth Be Told

    The truth be told, it took it’s toll, though. Every book I’ve ever been involved with (either writing or editing … just over 33 now) was like giving birth (I’m not qualified to say that, of course) without any pain medication, protracted labour in a fetid French gutter reminiscent of the great book, Perfume: The Story of A Murderer by  Patrick Süskind.

    Alison, like all the authors I know went through something like this:

    • My writing is shit
    • I’m shit
    • This is hard
    • I hate it
    • I hate myself
    • I awesome
    • I’m magnificent
    • Who am I kidding
    • I want to kill myself (just like Ernest Hemingway, Virginia Wolf, Hunter S. Thompson, Sylvia Plath and Yukio Mishima, amongst others).
    • Who wants to read this crap
    • This is self-indulgent
    • My life is boring
    • I’m boring
    • I hate my editor … she eviscerated me
    • I want that piece in it’s my best work … don’t take it out … nooo (Kill your darlings)
    • I have nothing more to say and I’ve only written 20 000 words.
    • Is this really my philosophy. I sound like a raving lunatic
    • What if people don’t like it
    • What if they hate it
    • What if I only sell 10
    • I want to belong
    • I want to be heard
    • I’m scared
    • I don’t want to be heard. I want to hide
    • I’m so lazy. I watched Netflix the whole day instead of writing
    • I’m lazy
    • I’m useless
    • My life’s a waste
    • I want to throw the book in the dustbin
    • I wish I could write like Margaret Atwood (no, shit, so do I)
    • This book’s not good enough
    • I’m not good enough
    • I will be persecuted
    • It’s my fault (what’s your fault? That your parents split up, that your partner doesn’t love you enough and, that the psychopath, Putin invaded the Ukraine? What is it that’s your fault?)

    Ok, so that was just off the top of my head.

    Writing is not for sissies

    Writing is not for sissies. But neither is living. It’s hard to craft a masterpiece. But that’s your job. Really, to make your life a masterwork and a masterpiece is the only worthwhile job. You’re the job.

    Not everyone should write a book, I get that. But everyone should go deep and explore who they are. Do the inner work. Do the hard work. You can’t outrun your demons, I promise you. They will catch you and mess you up. Read this article if you think you can hide.

    So, if you don’t want to write a book, at least journal and write about your feelings, fears and phobias. Write about your joy, your love, your magnificence, your awesomeness, your gratitude. Just fcken write.

    Here’s what you’ll find will happen. You’ll start learning about what triggers you. What story you believed so that you live like you do now. Who you really are and who you can really be. You’ll find out that you’re on your own personal journey with spirit. Don’t worry about anyone else’s journey … that’s their story. One day when they’re called home, they’ll be asked about their story, not yours. “Think about it: What weakens us is feeling offended by the deeds and misdeeds of our fellow men. Our self Importance requires that we spend most of our lives offended by someone.” Carlos Castaneda

    For me writing helps me get closer to me and to source. The more I shed what’s holding me back, the lighter I feel and I become lighter. I become light. The closer that I get to source, the more I realise that I was created in love, by love, for love. When I look at myself through my creator’s eyes I am in awe of how I am seen … I’m magnificent, masterful and majestic. I’m here for a purpose … to be the change I want to see in the world, to be light, to live, to love, I’m here to keep my heart open to the possibility of it all.

    So are you here … you that shine, love and live. Go full out, figure it out (sooner than later) and become the masterwork you were destined to be.

    Go and write something, even if it is just for yourself. If you need tools, go and look at Julia Cameron’s creative recovery writing tools. Another great tool is Jordan Peterson’s Self Authoring work.

    PS. If you want to put a book out in the world, but you’re scared. Consider this:

    I know that you probably have more writing talent in your left pinkie than I have in my whole body. Don’t get held back just because one person eviscerated your writing (you) on social media. Just because one person said you weren’t good enough (you are enough). Just because one person is hateful (hates themselves). That’s their pain and their story, not yours. Tell your story because it is useful and it will help others find the light the so desperately seek.

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  • Gratitude

    Gratitude

    Gratitude is the grammar of your soul
    Without it life can be quite a mess
    Be mindful that you’re the point of it all
    The story you’re in now was written for you, to enchant, enrapture and elevate you
    You’re not here to play small but to stand tall
    The creators ask nothing in return … except that you burn
    Burn with awe
    Burn with gratitude
    Burn with joy, happiness and LOVE
    You’re the point of it all
    You’re a masterwork creating a masterpiece
    You’re getting to express your divinity
    You’re getting to play here for a little while and get to move the dial
    You’re your creators’ greatest work. Their magnum opus
    Be in awe
    Be in gratitude
    Be you … you who are the point of it all

  • An Issue of Control

    An Issue of Control

    One of the biggest things I struggle with as I traverse this spiritual journey, is the concept of submitting to a higher power and relinquishing control of this entire endeavour.

    If it was only about submitting some things and keeping control of some things, then it would be easy. Who doesn’t want someone else to deal with one’s burdens, and take credit for one’s successes?

    The challenge is that we are told to submit and give up control of everything to a higher power.

    In Sufism we call it fanā (فناء‎ ) – basically, the annihilation of the human ego before God.

    I don’t know about you, but I find it hard to surrender my ego and my identity that I’ve worked so hard on consciously creating. Although, being a LinkedIn profile writer, is probably not the highest thing I could shoot for now, is it? In my youth I shot for philosopher … LinkedIn profile writer feels like settling (and, settling for anything that is not the highest expression of myself feels like hell).

    A friend of mine said the other day, “Surrendering feels like loss.” I think she’s right, it does feel like loss.

    Of the four things that underly any worthwhile pursuit … security, power/status, fulfilment and harmony, status is the biggest driver for most of us. And, that’s a race to the bottom, I tell you. Trying to impress anyone is an exercise in futility because it leaves one weakened, insecure, dissatisfied and disillusioned in the final analysis.


    All paths lead to nowhere, so find a path with heart. Carlos Castaneda


    The antidote to status is to:

    • Submit because you and I have no control of the outcomes (Covid is testament to this).
    • Be in awe and gratitude that we get to play here for a little while.
    • Do meaningful work so that we can become masterworks and make this life a masterpiece.

      We really are the point of it all. This story you’re living has been written to enchant you. Just by being born we have more than is our due. This means that we’re in overtime every day. Let’s just make the most of our life, and enjoy it for what it is.

      A gift.

      A moment in time.

      A miracle.

      No amount of money in your bank account can fill that hole in your chest called insecurity. Etsko Schuitema


      Let’s do something that scares us today … let’s be grateful, in awe and be present.

  • I go to the gymnasium every day

    I go to the gymnasium every day

    When I turned 50, I decided to show up in the world differently. I wanted to show up fitter, positively, kinder, loving, lovable and accessible.

    So, I decided to work on myself and went to gym.

    The prime motive being to become the full expression of my soul.

    I set up the following a protocol of exercises to achieve this.

    Here’s the workout, you’re welcome to use it:

    1. Physical. This body has been gifted to you for a short time to carry your soul, treasure it. Treat it with the respect it deserves. Feed it good nutrition if you can afford to. Exercise it. Don’t put toxins in it. Be kind to it.
    2. Mental. Your brain is the most essential part of your body. Use it, that’s what it is meant there for. Don’t be scared to stretch it and fill it. Stretch it with delightful, enchanting and energising thoughts. Fill it with the knowledge of the ages. Feed it right so that when you move across the river Styx, it’s as lucid as the day you were born. Nourish it with these genius foods: Olive oil, eggs, dark chocolate (85%+), salmon, grass-fed beef, avocado and blueberries.
    3. Emotional. Show up like a grown up. Give every situation it’s due. Act appropriately in every situation. Know when to be kind and know when to be courageous. Open your heart to everybody and treat them with kindness. But be courageous too … call them on their bullshit, selfishness, delusion, slothfulness, avarice, ego and pride. That’s the only way they’ll grow.
    4. Security. If you have a job or a business, and have people relying on you, show up like a grown up here too. Take this piece seriously. Your soul battles to express itself fully, if you’re insecure, uncertain, unfulfilled, disillusioned and disappointed. This world is benign to you. It is set up to serve you, enchant you and enlighten you. You’re the point of this entire endeavour. So, let it do its work. But you have to show up and do the work too.
    5. Relationships. Ultimately, we’re all looking for connection. Don’t be a doos. Just be a decent human. Once you get that you’re not here for you but for the other, this entire endeavour works better. Don’t go into any relationship for what you can get out of it. Always go into a relationship for what you can give. Don’t take your wounding out on others. We know that hurt people hurt people. Don’t be that person. Stop trying to fix others. They’ll do fine without your input. Rather mind your own business and focus on fixing yourself. There’s enough work there to last you several lifetimes, I promise you.
    6. Community. You’re in a cohort of souls. Tread lightly here. What you do has consequences. What you do matters. What you say has power. Your character is revealed in how you treat small men, and not how you treat big men that you think can move your agenda forward. God is in everyone. When you dismiss anyone, you dismiss God. Don’t take your standing in this world too seriously. When Charon takes you across the river Styx to the underworld, you’re not going to be able to cash in your status, influence and power to get you out of his boat. He’s immovable. When the book of your life is read back to you by the angel, be you a president or a pauper, you’ll be held to account equally. So, don’t take yourself too seriously, seriously.

    I run my life through the filter of these six workouts every day so that I can navigate this gymnasium that has been built for me, with elegance, eloquence and courtesy.

    I’ve got to tell you, I’ve still got a shitload of work to make this endeavour work. The only thing I have got going in my favour is that I’m committed to consistently showing up at the gymnasium and working out.

    Do you want to join me? It’s not easy, but I think it’s worth it. 

  • Where do you put your punctuation point?

    Where do you put your punctuation point?

    Some of my friends are earth angels, lightworkers, philosophers, shamans and spiritual preceptors.

    Some of them wrestle with doing good in the world and charging for it. And, some charge, but battle to charge like grown-ups or give friends and rates to everyone. Perhaps I should shut up about that since I’m a textbook rescuer and guilty on all counts (sometimes).

    Sometimes this leaves them poor financially.

    Some of my friends are hard-nosed, realists, cynics, hedonists, hard-charging, goal-driven, in-the-world, those who die with the most toys win, A-types. They have no problem making a shit ton of money.

    Sometimes this leaves them short-changed in the meaning department.

    Some of my friends have hit the Goldilocks spot between function and meaning. Those are the ones I want to learn from.

    In this instance, a discourse by Shaykh Ebrahim Schuitema, a Sufi Teacher from the Darqawi-Shadhiliya Tariqa gives us something to work with so that we can navigate these two opposites elegantly and eloquently.

    He explores the theme that’s associated with understanding the difference between predatory and receptive attention.

    One must be careful not to be too moralistic about the distinction between predatory and receptive attention, because human beings are predators. We do have eyes like any predator. And if you take that capacity out, then you basically, fundamentally disable a human being.

    So, there’s a part to us which is about action, which is about goal-directedness, which is about achieving outcomes, which is really part of our constitution and our nature.

    Just as there’s a part of our being, which is about perceiving, which is about seeing what’s coming towards us and experiencing things, and we call that part of our soul’s receptive attention.

    All human beings have both predatory attention and receptive attention.

    The concern isn’t that one should compete and disable the one in favour of the other. The issue is that in our current culture, predatory attention is overused. And as a result, people experience lives that are less nourishing than what they can be.

    If you’re absolutely goal directed and everything you’re doing is about an outcome, and you’re chasing outcomes the whole time, you forget to sniff the flowers on the way and experiences that you have on the way, pass you by. Because you’re not open to them, you’re not letting them in.

    However, if you completely abandon all outcomes you don’t get anywhere either. If you don’t have somewhere you’re walking to, there aren’t flowers to pass. So you need an outcome, but the issue is what is primarily the outcome of the process and our journey. Our path is about incrementally, very deliberately becoming more concerned with the process of outcome.

    And that is simultaneously, then, developing a greater capacity for receptive attention rather than predatory attention.

    One must understand this is about life quality, then it’s also not about making war on our capacity to be predatory, but to see this rather as a foreground and background issue. In other words, what do you make significant? What do you make worthy of your attention?

    Don’t make the outcome the point, make the process the point.

    You can’t have a process if you don’t have an outcome, so I’m not arguing that you get rid of the goal, but you don’t make that the point. You make doing the thing well the point, and then you’re nourished by what you’re doing.

    This also then translates into how one experiences one’s life. When a person’s attention is primarily predatory in character, your attention is really that you’re very concerned with functional stuff, you’re sort of doing stuff to get stuff. You’re making things work, whereas when your attention is receptive, you’re much more concerned with appreciating, rather than making things work. 

    Receptive attention is really the attention that is concerned with meaning and predatory attention is concerned with function.

    If you want a meaningful life, then this is not about achieving huge amounts of things. People consider that having achievement is producing a meaningful life. Well, not so, I mean you have somebody who decides that they need three degrees, and their life becomes meaningful once they have the PhD. They get the PhD, and then they throw themselves off the top of the building because they discovered the same miserable wretch woke up the day after getting capped with the degrees.

    So a meaningful life is not about outcomes, a meaningful life is about appreciating things and seeing the meaning of what’s coming towards you.

    Our lives need both function and meaning when you’re on this path. The average person’s pursuit is concerned with function. We’re concerned with paying the bills, feeding the family putting our kids through school, getting some retirement money. That’s what’s called making things work.

    When you’re on this path you’re not trying to make things not work, but you’re not making the working the point, in fact you might spend the same amount of time in either activity.

    It’s what you emphasise. Well, what do we mean by this distinction between function and meaning? Clearly, Salah (Muslim prayer) is about meaning. It’s about shutting up, stopping, giving up and allowing the world to come to you so that you can read the text. Although we’re not doing the reading, as much as cultivating the quietude, that enables us to read what Allah’s bringing to us.

    And then there’s action. There’s a need to do stuff, such as being functional.

    You’ll be making business … going to work, feeding the kids and paying the bond. This is as it should be.

    The issue isn’t that you shouldn’t have both, the issue is, which one do you make the punctuation point of your life

    So, one way of saying it is to say that the purpose of my day is to do the work that’s required of me, and on occasion, I’ll look up, and realise that it’s time for Salah. That’s when you’ve been very functional in your approach to life.

    If I’m trying to have a meaningful life, the Salah is actually the purpose of my day; that’s what gets the emphasis.

    One of the attributes of the distinction between predatory and receptive attention is that when your attention is predatory, you have to work very hard to achieve outcomes, precisely because the more you chase them, the more elusive they become. Like when a buck flees from a lion. So the outcome runs away from you.

    When your attention is receptive, outcomes come towards you. Which means to say, in a very paradoxical way, when you commit to practice, when you make the rest of your day fit around your Salah, not the other way around, the rest of your day goes extraordinarily easily, and you achieve the most extraordinary outcomes, you become super functional.

    So, it is inaccurate to say, “I’m too busy to pray.”

    You have a hard life. When you have a functional life, you have a life that is about grind, about earning your keep by the sweat of your brow.

    You have a life of ease when you experience the world as your benefactor and your ally.

    (☞ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)☞ If you want to receive similar texts to your inbox, sign up to them here. I send one out every Wednesday.