Tag: unseen

  • The Ghost Who Learned To See

    The Ghost Who Learned To See

    Just this Saturday evening, at a friend’s dinner party, it happened again.
    I turned into a ghost.

    I was mid-sentence — telling someone something mildly interesting — when a woman slipped into the space between us and began a fresh conversation with him. No apology. No glance. No flicker of awareness that I had existed in that moment.

    So I did what ghosts do.
    I vanished. I walked to the drinks table, poured myself a stiff whisky, and faded from the room. Neither of them noticed I was gone.

    It’s an old pattern by now.
    Insert. Interrupt. Ignore.
    A quiet haunting.

    The Different Faces of the Same Ghost

    You may know this feeling.

    I cook. I clean. I wash. I work. I pick up. I drop off. I love. I shout. I scream.
    They don’t hear me.
    They don’t see me.
    I’m a mother. I’m a ghost.

    I fix things. I work. I carry. I pay. I love.
    I shout. I scream.
    They don’t hear me.
    They don’t see me.
    I’m a father. I’m a ghost.

    I stand at the corner. I hold a sign. I smile when I can.
    I am hungry. I am tired. I am human.
    But cars look through me.
    I’m a beggar. I’m a ghost.

    I study. I eat. I stay in my room. I try to belong.
    No one calls my name.
    I scroll, but I am never tagged.
    I’m a child. I’m a ghost.

    I’m restless. I’m needy. I’m unfulfilled. I’m weak. I’m powerless. I’m in pain.
    I want to be loved. I want to love. I’m lost. I’m lonely. I’m alone.
    Please, someone, notice me.
    I’m human. I’m a ghost.

    What a Ghost Really Is

    A ghost is not dead.
    A ghost is unseen.

    A ghost lives in the silent gap between what we do
    and what the world remembers.

    If you have ever felt lost, unappreciated, unloved, shamed, afraid, unfulfilled, regretful, guilty, disappointed, fractured — then you already know what a ghost feels like.

    It wanders through expectations, rattling chains of “Why didn’t they notice?” and “When will it be my turn?”

    It can’t leave.
    It can’t rest.
    It waits for an apology that never comes.

    The Moment of Release

    A ghost is freed the moment it understands:

    The world owes it nothing.

    Not love.
    Not applause.
    Not understanding.

    Children owe nothing.
    Parents owe nothing.
    Spouses, bosses, strangers — owe nothing.

    And this is not bleak.
    This is the beginning.

    Because once the ghost stops tallying what wasn’t given,
    it can begin offering what it always wanted:

    Appreciation.
    Awe.
    Attention.
    Compassion.
    Love.

    The ghost is released the moment it chooses to see, instead of waiting to be seen.

    Becoming Human Again

    Peace is not found in being noticed.
    Peace is found in noticing.

    In saying:
    “I see you. Even if you don’t see me.”
    “I hear you. Even if you never hear my name.”
    “I will not haunt this life. I will inhabit it.”

    Hello, my name is Jacques.

    I see you.
    I hear you.
    I feel you.

    Would you like to have an (uninterrupted) conversation?

  • The night I turned into a ghost

    The night I turned into a ghost

    Jacques de Villiers – writing quest: Article 34/365

    Just this Saturday evening I was at a friend’s dinner party when it happened again. I turned into a ghost.

    I was telling someone something mildly interesting when a woman inserted herself into the conversation and with nary a blink, started talking to the person. I exited the conversation and poured myself a stiff drink. Neither noticed that I’d left.

    It’s not the first time this theme has played itself out for me. It’s been an all too regular occurrence: insert, interrupt, ignore.

    I get paid to talk to people, but in social situations, I struggle to have conversations for free.

    I’m convinced that I’m interesting. I get asked to be a +1 at many functions because I can handle myself well in a social setting. I know I’m a marvellous specimen to look at, but it can’t just be that surely? I must be mildly interesting too?

    Do you sometimes feel invisible, unheard and unseen? Do you feel like you’re a ghost?

    I cook. I clean. I wash. I work. I pick up. I drop off. I love. I shout. I scream. They don’t hear me. They don’t see me. I’m alone. I’m a mother. I’m a ghost.

    I fix things. I work. I pick up. I drop off. I love. I shout. I scream. They don’t hear me. They don’t see me. I’m lonely. I’m a father. I’m a ghost.

    I stand on the street corner. I work. I wave my sign. I smile. I look frail. I’m hungry. I’m lonely. I’m hurt. I love. I shout. I scream. Why don’t they see me? Why don’t they hear me? I’m a beggar. I’m a ghost.

    I study. I eat. I stay in my room. I do chores. I love. I’m lonely. I try to fit in. I don’t fit in. Why am I invisible? I shout. I scream. I’m a son. I’m a daughter. I’m a child. I’m a ghost.

    I’m restless. I’m needy. I’m unfulfilled. I’m weak. I’m powerless. I’m in pain. I want to be loved. I want to love. I’m lost. I’m lonely. I’m alone. Please, someone, notice me. I’m human. I’m a ghost.

    If you have ever felt lost, unappreciated, unloved, shamed, apathetic, fearful, unfulfilled, regretful, guilty, dissatisfied, disjointed, fractured, or disappointed, then you know what a ghost feels like.

    It can’t find peace and leave this place because it’s stuck in a pit of self-pity, a river of regret, and a desert of depression.

    It’ll only be released to blessed peace and the bosom of mother Eden when it lets go of its expectations of how the world should be.

    If it expects the world to appreciate, love, and be grateful for its existence, it will be stuck in eternal regret, dissatisfaction, and disappointment.

    The ghost can only find solace when it realises that the world owes it nothing. Its children owe it nothing. Its boss doesn’t owe it anything. Its employees do not owe it anything. Its spouse does not owe it anything. The planet owes it nothing.

    It will only find peace and move on when it realises that it owes everything – appreciation, happiness, awe, gratitude and love to the world and those that rent space in it.

    We should make peace with the world as it is now and make peace with our role in it. The consequences and regret of not doing so will last for an eternity. The ghost will be released into joy only when it accepts things as they are and surrenders with grace.

    “Hello, my name is Jacques. I see you. I hear you. I feel you. Would you like to have a (uninterrupted) conversation?”